22. The Friendship Struggle: Finding Your People as a Busy Entrepreneur

Today, we’re diving into something that’s been hitting hard lately—friendships. If you haven’t already, go back and check out Episode 19 with Troy Karnes, where we talk about friendships and overcoming challenges. He shares an amazing method called FORD (Family, Occupation, Recreation, Dreams) to guide conversations and deepen connections. I’ll link it in the show notes for you!

Why Is Maintaining Friendships So Hard?

If you’ve ever stared at your phone, wanting to text a friend but feeling too drained to type, or if your social circle has shrunk since becoming a parent or entrepreneur, this episode is for you! Today, we’re unpacking why friendships feel so challenging in adulthood and how we can nurture them even in the midst of chaos.

What’s Making Friendships Tough?

1. Time Constraints
2. Mental Load
3. Guilt

5 Practical Ways to Stay Connected Without the Stress

1. The Five-Minute Check-In Rule – You don’t need an hour-long conversation to show you care. A quick “Hey, thinking of you! How’s life?” text or voice memo keeps the connection alive.
2. Low-Effort, High-Impact Hangouts – Skip the fancy brunch plans that take months to coordinate. Try a walk-and-talk call, a coffee date at a kid-friendly park, or even a co-working Zoom session in silence.
3. Leverage Voice Memos – Texting can feel like a chore, but a quick voice memo makes it personal, easy, and engaging. Plus, your tone of voice adds warmth that text just can’t.
4. Create a Friendship Ritual – Whether it’s a monthly group chat, Friday meme exchanges, or a quarterly girls’ night, routines make it easier to stay connected.
5. Give Yourself Grace – Friendships don’t have to be perfect. The right people will understand that love isn’t measured in daily texts but in showing up when it truly matters.

Links & Resources:

• Episode 19 with Troy Karnes
• Submit Your Sip & Share Story: Click here to submit

Cheers! Thank you for joining us for another episode. Have a chaotic moment, question, or topic you want us to cover? Drop us a message or leave a review! If you loved this episode, share it with a friend who thrives in beautiful chaos too.

Let’s Connect:

• Connect with us via email at ccpodcast@aguonstudios.com
• Follow us on Instagram: @caffeinatedchaospodcast
• Join our email list: Click Here to Become a VIP
• Sip and Share: Click here to submit

Resources:

• Goal-Setting Template
• Podcasters Monthly Networking Meets
• Balancing Business Growth and Parenthood Workbook

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Transcript

0:35

Welcome to Caffeinated Chaos, where business deals happen between diaper changes and friendships are fueled by caffeine. I'm Whitney Uggen, your host, and I'm here to talk all things business, parenthood, and of course, keeping up with the BFFs. Whether you're juggling the boardroom, the playroom, or just here for some coffee fueled chaos, we've got you covered. Get ready for real talk, laughs, and a whole lot of heart as we dive into the beautiful mess that is entrepreneurship, parenthood, and everything in between. So let's embrace the chaos together. Caffeinated, of course. Welcome back to Caffeine Chaos, so today we're gonna be talking about something that has been hitting hard lately, friendships. And if you haven't already, Go back and listen to episode 19 with Troi Karnes where we talk about friendships and overcoming challenges. It is a really good one. In there, he talks about using Ford as a kind of a baseline for what to ask friends, and that's family, occupation, recreation, and dreams. So, that's a really good episode, so go back to that. Again, that's episode 19. I will link it down in the show notes. But, today, we are going to take another approach to friendship. Have you ever found yourself staring at your phone waiting to text a friend but feeling too drained to actually type out the message? Or maybe you're starting to feel like your social circle is shrinking since you became a parent or a business owner? This episode is for you. It's happened to me, so let's get into it, okay? Making friends and maintaining friendships, especially the maintaining part, as a entrepreneur and also as a parent just feels like scheduling a zoom call with five people in different time zones. Nearly impossible, but let me say, but we do need community. And today we're going to be talking about why friendships are so dang hard right now, how to navigate the guilt of feeling like a Bad friend and some practical ways to build relationships even when the life even when life is chaotic All right, so grab your coffee and let's get into it Okay, so let's break it down Why does friendships feel so much harder in adulthood, especially when you're running a business while raising tiny humans? first There's the whole time issue When we're younger, friendships happen naturally. We saw them at school, at work, at random social events, but now finding time to hang out with friends feels like trying to get your toddler to put on shoes when you ask the first time. I know. Impossible. And then there's the mental load. Our brains are running already at full capacity, balancing work. Deadlines, meal planning, school drop offs, if you have kids in school, and remembering to switch the laundry before it gets too musky and smells like a wet dog. So, when do we get a free moment? Sometimes the last thing we have energy for is socializing, you know? Oh, and let's just forget about the guilt that we have. The I should have text back earlier, guilt, you know, or the I saw that Instagram post and forgot to send a gif, guilt. It's real and it's heavy and if you're nodding along, yep, I see you and I promise, I promise you, you are not alone. Okay, so. We've established that maintaining relationships as a business entrepreneur is basically an extreme sport. Let's talk about some realistic ways to stay connected without adding more stress to our already overflowing planes. One. I like this one. The five minute check in rule. You don't need an hour long catch up session to show someone you care. You can send a quick, hey, I was thinking about you, how's life text. It takes 30 seconds, but it reminds your friends that they matter. I've done this recently, too, where I've checked up with friends and we're like, hey, yeah, I've been busy, you've been busy, totally understand what's new, what's going on. CliffsNotes version, right? Also, I've done this with my friends who are business owners as well, or people that I know, and I just send them a quick voice memo off of Instagram. And so then it's like, how are you? Girl, I'm doing great! I saw you have a new program. Yeah, how's that going? And so, it really is just something quick, you know? Doing quick checkups definitely, definitely does work. And you know, sometimes a five minute checkup might actually turn into an hour check in. All right, number two, low effort, high impact hangouts. Forget fancy brunches that require courting schedules like two months in advance. Try the walk and talk phone call while you're pushing the stroller, a coffee date at a kid friendly park, or even a co working space in silence on Zoom while you tackle your to do list. 3. Leverage voice memos. Like I said before when I was talking about the 5 minute rule, typing out text can feel like a chore, but sending a quick voice memo is so much easier. And it's kind of like leaving little mini podcast episodes for your friends. I love this. Okay. I also really love this as a podcast host, because some people. Because some people who want to be my guest on podcasts will leave me voice memos as a way to introduce themselves. And so I think that people are under utilizing voice memos a lot. And it is a quick way to kind of get your fix, get your point, and they get to hear your tone of voice. So they can hear your sincerity in the way that you're asking about their lives more than they can ever get from text. Four, create a friendship ritual. Set up a reoccurring reminder to check in with your people, whether it's a monthly group chat, a Hey, let's always send memes on Friday tradition. That's new. I think I like that one. Or a quarterly girls night. When it's built into your routine, it doesn't feel like another to do. And if it's something that you really want to stay focused on and have, make it one of your non negotiables. We've talked about non negotiables before. And having one of those as a non negotiable means that you will make sure that you have the time for that. That everything else can wait if you really want to focus and prioritize maintaining your friendships. 5. I say this in almost every episode, but give yourself grace. Friendships are not perfect. You are doing your best at being present. You won't always be available for your friends and that's okay. Alright? The right people in your lives will understand that love is not measured in daily text. It's the way you show up for them when they need you to in moments that really matter. Alright? So give yourself grace like you do in everything else. Like I always say, give yourself grace. You are doing amazing. Before we wrap up, I just want to share one more thing and that is don't forget about our sip and share segments We are collecting stories from you our listeners whether you want to put your name on it or not You can be totally anonymous in this but you can submit a chaotic moment, a piece of advice, a funny story, or even a question that you have that you want answered on the podcast. And I will pick some of them and I will start weaving them into our episodes. So don't forget to get yours submitted. The link is down in the show notes. All right, friends, if you've been feeling like you're failing at friendships because your life is insanely busy, just know this, you're not a bad friend. You're a human with a full plate, and the friendships that matter, they don't need constant attention. They just need intention. So this week, I challenge you to send that text. or that voice memo, schedule that coffee date, or even just say, Hey, I miss you because even in chaos, connection matters. If this episode resonated with you, take a screenshot, share it on Instagram and tag me at caffeinatedchaospodcasts. And I love to see who is out there listening to us. And if you really, really liked the episode, leave us a review. It helps us be seen by so much more people, and until next time, keep connecting, embrace the chaos and those close to you. I will see you all next time. Bye now.